This blog is brought to you by Marissa Parker Gold of IntuitParenting.
We know from a body of research that the ability to self-soothe, delay gratification, and meet emotional needs are the most necessary skills for our children’s long-term success. In fact, studies have shown that these skills may be more important than IQ scores and as such, have become a core focus for parenting today.
Knowing where to focus should make parenting easier and yet why do so many parents always feel exhausted, that their patience is eternally thin and tried and that they are just “out of ideas” for ways to have their child “get with the program”? Many parents are not using their number one tool, Positive Discipline, to enrich the lives of their children. Instead, parents are frequently using discipline as punitive punishment, whether purposefully or not. Sadly, it is all too easy for parents to fall into the trap of giving time outs, threatening and yelling – even when it is known that these types of discipline do not work with children, at all.
The science of brain development teaches us that the brain is first and foremost a survival organ. When a child’s brain feels nurtured, loved and safe, it is in an optimal position for growth, learning and progress. This growth comes from parental education and positive discipline. So, what does this look like? What types of tools should every parent have in their Parenting Tool Kit to better discipline their child(ren)? Discipline is not about punishment; it is about learning right from wrong. Therefore, parents and teachers make up your child’s Parenting Team and this team is solely responsible for teaching children about developmentally appropriate behavior, with carefully narrated and respectful examples for what is right versus wrong.
Next time you are yelling at or “disciplining” your child, stop and think, what am I teaching my child right now, in this moment? Most of the time, the answer is that, despite best intentions, a parent is actually modeling incorrect behavior and triggering the brain into fight or flight mode. Have you noticed that when a child is tantruming, if you try to “reason” in the moment, your child will only escalate? What happens if you send your child to the time out chair? Do they return with a heartfelt apology? Probably not. If we want our children’s behaviors to improve, we need to learn to discipline with respect, logical consequences and positive role modeling. Positive discipline is paramount to raising happy, respectful and well-behaved children. Engaging your child’s brain in this type of discipline will create a happier child and you, the parents, will reap the rewards of that behavior for years to come.
Join me, Tuesday, Dec 5th, as we discuss the Intersection of Positive Discipline, mindfulness, your child’s brain, and raising happy children. I will give you the Positive Discipline tools you want and your children need. Let’s build your Parenting Toolkit, together.
About Marissa Parker Gold:
Marissa is an expert in Brain-Based Parenting – using what we know about how the brain develops during different stages of a child’s early life to make informed parenting decisions around discipline, behavior, sleep, eating, transitional moments, and more. Her deep understanding of how to apply science to parenting decisions has helped her become a respected teacher, private consultant, and speaker.
As the Founder of IntuitParenting, Marissa is dedicated to serving parents throughout their child’s developmental years – in private consultations, parenting groups (both Mommy and Me and Parent Education seminars), and school and community presentations and workshops.
Marissa’s unique perspective focuses on helping parents by reinforcing intuitive, positive, respectful, and attentive parenting. Ultimately helping you to have a deeper understanding for the developmental needs of your child and the ability to engage in non-confrontational and respectful communication, effective modeling, authentic, present, and mindful parenting. To learn more, visit the IntuitParenting website at intuitparenting.com.
Stratford School Los Angeles is excited to host a Positive Discipline Workshop featuring parenting expert Marissa Parker Gold on Tuesday, December 5 at 10 a.m. The workshop is FREE and open to the public with registration. Register to attend.